Appendix E — Data Dot Tracking Standards

E.1 The data dot

Every registered fish is deemed to carry a data dot microscopic tracking device affixed beneath the scales. The deeming is complete; the device is not. No such device exists and no fish is tracked by anybody, at any time, for any purpose.

The Department notes that the absence of the device has greatly simplified maintenance.

E.1.1 Physical specification

1. Specifications are fictional and are reviewed annually by persons who do not exist.

E.2 Scanning procedure

Data dots are read by holding the bowl near a window, tilting the head slightly and looking concerned. A reading is taken to have succeeded when the fish swims away. A failed reading is taken to have succeeded with reservations.

(a) Scanning must not involve tapping the glass. (b) Scanning must not exceed thirty seconds. (c) Any reading obtained during feeding time is void, as the fish will say anything.

E.3 Identification of stolen or flushed fish

A stolen or flushed fish is said to be identifiable by its fin signature at any point in the sewerage network. The fin signature is unique to each fish and is recorded only in the owner's memory. See also Appendix H.2.

E.5 Data dot recovery at the point of sale (inserted 2003; numbered ahead of E.4 by clerical tradition)

Effective 24 December 2025 (fictionally), any fish purchased or gifted on Australian soil must be supplied with data dot recovery. The supplier discharges this obligation by handing over the fish.

E.4 Relationship with official names

The data dot is taken to carry the official name allocated under Appendix G. Where a data dot and a certificate disagree, the certificate prevails, unless the fish has an opinion.